The Boy in the Train

The 1913 work is the most famous poem about Scottish trains … and linoleum.

Mary Campbell (Edgar) Smith (1869–1960)

The Boy in the Train is a poem written by Mary Campbell (Edgar) Smith (1869–1960), and was first published in 1913. 

Mrs. Smith was the wife of the headmaster of Merchiston Castle School in Edinburgh. When asked to contribute to a schoolboys’ magazine, she produced ‘The Boy in the Train’, thus immortalizing a noisy lad who had once been in the compartment when the Smiths were on their way by train to their annual Easter holiday in Elie.

The poem describes the steam train journey of an un-named, young boy with his mother and father, from an unnamed western point on the coastal train line in Fife, as they travel eastwards and then north to Kirkcaldy railway station, to visit his grandmother.

The poem is a range of questions asked and excited, humorous observations made by the boy, leaving no space for any reply, but showing his developing reasoning as he goes through a landscape he starts to recognize. 

The famous "queer-like smell" of Kirkcaldy's many linoleum factories lets the boy know that they will soon be arriving in Kirkcaldy.

It is a popular poem in Scottish culture, often being a children's party piece, and recited by generations of primary school children. 

The crime-writer Val McDermid, who was born in Kirkcaldy, has said "As school kids we all had to learn The Boy in the Train".

The Poem

Whit wey does the engine say ‘Toot-toot’?

Is it feart to gang in the tunnel?

Whit wey is the furnace no pit oot

When the rain gangs doon the funnel?

What’ll I hae for my tea the nicht?

A herrin’, or maybe a haddie?

Has Gran’ma gotten electric licht?

Is the next stop Kirkcaddy?

There’s a hoodie-craw on yon turnip-raw!

An’ seagulls! – sax or seeven.

I’ll no fa’ oot o’ the windae, Maw,

Its sneckit, as sure as I’m leevin’.

We’re into the tunnel! we’re a’ in the dark!

But dinna be frichtit, Daddy,

We’ll sune be comin’ to Beveridge Park,

And the next stop’s Kirkcaddy!

Is yon the mune I see in the sky?

It’s awfu’ wee an’ curly,

See! there’s a coo and a cauf ootbye,

An’ a lassie pu’in’ a hurly!

He’s chackit the tickets and gien them back,

Sae gie me my ain yin, Daddy.

Lift doon the bag frae the luggage rack,

For the next stop’s Kirkcaddy!

There’s a gey wheen boats at the harbour mou’,

And eh! dae ya see the cruisers?

The cinnamon drop I was sookin’ the noo

Has tummelt an’ stuck tae ma troosers. . .

I’ll sune be ringin’ ma Gran’ma’s bell,

She’ll cry, ‘Come ben, my laddie’,

For I ken mysel’ by the queer-like smell

That the next stop’s Kirkcaddy!

Source: Scottish Poetry Library

---